Talk Like A Pirate Day

"Captain Hook must remember

Not to scratch his toes.

Captain Hook must watch out

And never pick his nose.

Captain Hook must be gentle

When he shakes your hand.

Captain Hook must be careful

Openin' sardine cans

And playing tag and puring tea

And turnin' pages of his book.

Lots of folks I'm glad I aint -

But mostly Captain Hook!"

~Shel Silverstein.

Let's Give It Up For Dinosaurs

IF I HAD A BRONTOSAURUS

If I had a brontosaurus,

I would name him Horace or Morris.

But if suddenly one day he had

A lot of little brontosauri---

I would change his name

To Laurie.

~Shell Silverstien, Where The Sidewalk Ends

The Pirate

Because I'm a pirate and love all things of such kind...

Oh, the blithery, blathery pirate

(His name, I believe, is Claude),

His manner is sullen and irate,

And his humor is vulgar and broad.

He has often been known to imprison

His friends in the hold dark and dank,

Or lash them up high on the mizzen,

Or force them to stroll down a plank.

He will selfishly ask you to dig up

Some barrels of ill-gotten gold,

And if you so much as just higgup,

He'll leave youto fill up the hole.

He may cast you adrift in a rowboat

(He has no reaction to tears)

Or put you ashore with NO boat

On an island and leave you for years.

He's a rotter, a wretch and a sinner,

He's foul as a fellow can be,

But if you invite hime to dinner,

Oh, please sit him next to me!

- Shel Silverstein

True Story

This morning I jumped on my horse
And I went out for a ride,
And some wild outlaws chased me
And they shot me in the side.
So I crawled into a wild cat's cave
To find a place to hide,
But some pirates found me sleeping there,
And soon they had me tied
To a pole and built a fire
Under me - I almost cried
Till a mermaid came and cut me loose
And begged to be my bride,
So I said I'd come back Wednesday
But I must admit I lied.
Then I ran into a jungle swamp
But I forgot my guide
And I stepped into some quicksand,
And no matter how I tried
I couldn't get out, until I met
A water snake named Clyde,
Who pulled me into some cannibals
Who planned to have me fried.
But an eagle came and swooped me p
And through the air we flied,
But he dropped me in a boiling lake
A thousand miles wide.
And you'll never guess what I did then -
I DIED.